Thursday, March 4, 2010

Impending Dawn




The night drags on….
I am still waiting for the shimmering lights
Promised to me by the oncoming dawn
The genies of night
Tell me to leave
It’s a pointless waiting they say.

Should optimism bow down to the night
Should I sell my belief to the highest bidder,
Or the stronger contender.
I am perched on the ledge of despair
The genies have started dancing,
Around black fires that give no light, no warmth
Strangely I’m comforted…
The lights would be easier to spot now.

I sit and wait
In the cold cold night
Dew drops gather around me
And the chill from the devils fire permeates my bones
They are hoarding
The creatures of the night
They surround me with their distance
Their formalities
Their lullabies, their sugared words
Hypocrisies but can never provide warmth.
I am lured to join them, they provide me wine
I could be drink away from all what they promise.

It takes me my life, my soul and all my memories to refuse
To sit tight on my rocky ledge
To sweat despite the cold
Waiting for the promise
Waiting for life, loving this cold….almost.

The devils are not evil,
They just want to win…
They have had failures before…
Broken they cant hope to see light again…fearing it might not come
And what if they hoped again… but in vain.
They have lost so much,
That they befriend the night
Devoid of courage to heal their wounded hearts
And petrified souls.

Now, they strive to help me
They don’t believe that dawn is for real
They don’t want me to be hurt…
And don’t want me to win either
Jealous of my faith, they must dissuade me
From my quest,
What if I win, and they lose…
What if all is lost….

I see a beautiful soul, not yet black among them
She dances so beautifully away from the fire
It warms my heart just to see her
A swan with a broken wing…
I look at her, wondering if she was the light promised
How could it be
As she carries the shadow of night with her…
As do the others of the devils.

I must talk to her…
I reach out to touch her cold skin,
She recoils from my warm touch,
Its unusual, and long forgotten.
I see her trying to reject it,
As they have forsaken the warmth forever
Lest it be taken away…
She tries to run…
But I cant let her get away.
I have been promised love.

I pursue her, in the night.
The places she goes are cold,
The rush of winds chills my heart
And we both are panting…
The chase stops when she does… unable to continue.
I hold her tight and kiss her.
Kissing her cold away, kissing her into warmth.
Trying to draw her out of her body in mine…
Loving her, stroking her hair, professing my love
Waiting for her to believe me
Warming her
Waiting for her to respond.

Her chill and the night are seeping into me
I am getting colder and colder
Is death tugging at me…
Cold thoughts surround me
I haven’t let her go still
But is she a ploy,
A nymph to get me forsake the warmth I endear
Is she the devil herself sucking my warmth that I’m trying to sate?
I don’t have too much strength left, I need the dawn
Even if she is the light promised,
The night and the run have taken their toll…
The darkness seems to wait for me to pass into
It promises me warmth, and love and her, if she is the devil…

I have used up every ounce of my warmth
She is warmer, but I’m too cold
Maybe beyond repair…

My eyes are swimming with dew drops or tears, I’m not sure.
The cold makes them freeze on my eyelids…
The weight is too much…
I have to close my eyes…
The darkness can swallow me
I did all I can
Fought as much as I could.


And as my eyes almost close,
She kisses me back,
She responds to my touch, my cold body
Filling me with her ethereal light,
Hope, love and promise… and her.
She heals me and feels me…
Like a baby exploring the world
Slowly and slowly… we bond…
The night is still on, and I’m still cold.
But I shall live, with my new hope and my delicate swan…

She gives me strength, I give her hope.
Together we reach the devils,
With my cold body they notice me not
And we mingle and dance around the black fire…
The dawn will come… of that I’m sure.

We talk to the devils,
Tell them of our love…
We tell them of our hope….
And that cold need not keep the warmth out
She makes them remember
She communicates in a way I never could…
She tells them of our kiss
Of my tears and hers….
We share the visions of a new dawn…
She sees it through my eyes, and they through hers…

Yes, they could finally see it…
And they believed it…

I hold her close, she much warmer than me
When the dawn did come for us…
I was exuberated, and she petrified by the brilliance
Which gave way to acceptance, and finally happiness.
The devils also rose one by one…
With new found courage to face the sun.
And new strength and love was found…
In each pair of eyes around.

My bird had her wings healed; she flew away into the twilight…
And left me with hope and a heart full of love
And memories strong enough to carry on for the rest of my life.